Confession #1: My leg hair is the longest it has ever been. Ever.
I measured it. Oh yeah, I totally measured it. Those beauties came in at 3/8 of an inch. That’s half way between 1/4 and 1/2 of an inch for all you non-fraction folks. But hair equals warmth and you do what you gotta do in Alaska. It’s a good thing I’ll be shaving on Friday to go to the pool. 😉
Confession #2: I only shower every other day. Sometimes, I go three days in between showers.
Even though I’m not in drought-stricken South Texas anymore, water is quite a luxury in Bethel. Most houses in town don’t have piped water; water is delivered via trucks. Transporting water this way makes it pretty expensive, causing you to save water any way you can. That, and the fact that I’m not sweaty and stinky everyday, allows me to get by with less showers. When you come by to see me just hope you came on a shower day.
Confession #3: I’ve been a slave to fear the majority of my life.
Boy is this a real struggle for me. I didn’t even realize I lived in fear until recently.
When we made the journey to Alaska I packed up my pal fear and brought him with the rest of my baggage. The first few days were a breeze; fear didn’t spring up much. But then I became inundated with constant fear of not having enough money to pay for anything.
I was afraid we wouldn’t have enough money to pay old bills from San Antonio, to pay new bills in Bethel, to buy food, to buy a vehicle, to pay for gas.
I started basing all my decisions on this nagging fear, even the decision to buy spices. We had thought ahead to mail a few boxes to ourselves while we waited for our household goods to arrive. One said box was loaded with kitchen spices. Days went by and all of our mail arrived but that spice box. Since I anticipated its arrival, I created meals based on those spices. When it didn’t show up, I panicked because groceries cost two to three times as much here.
I don’t want God to think I’m a bad steward by buying spices that I already own.
I don’t want to waste money.
If I don’t by spices then how do I prepare this meal? I can’t let it go to waste. Then I will really waste what God has given us.
If I can’t handle buying spices then what’s wrong with me?
I’m such a failure since I’m freaking out about spices!!!
It seems ridiculus now but these thoughts and more cycled over and over in my brain. I was afraid to buy spices and afraid not to by spices.
2 Timothy 1:7
God has not given us a spirit of fear, but of power, love, and a sound mind.
This has been my go-to verse and let me tell you why. For a minute or two I’m going to go Greek on you…but keep with me. It is SOOOOOOO worth it!
Here are a couple of key words from that verse and the Greek definition and meaning behind them:
Fear-timidity or fear; derived from a word which implies faithless
So when I am fearful, I am faithless. In other words, I am trading my faith in God for fear. But God hasn’t given me a spirit of fear.
I can choose to fight against my fear and claim this verse! Here’s what he has given me (and you too).
Power-force, miraculous power; ability, abundance, might, mighty
Love-love, affection, benevolence
Sound Mind-discipline, self control; sound mind
So catch this…God has given me a miracle level of power and ability to love and have a sound mind. He has given me an abundant, mighty, disciplined, force to chose faith over fear. Now that’s some good news!
My hubby ended up buying spices for me and I made my dinner to the tune of less than $10.
How is fear holding you back today? Are you willing to trade fear for faith?